On Our Own
by AsparagusTheFirst
Summary: Amanda reflects on her situation.


Author: Asparagus I

Disclaimer: I don't own Scarecrow and Mrs. King or the original characters, I just write. No money or profit is gained from this venture.

On Our Own

            "Lee, where are you?" Amanda looked down at their two-month-old daughter and wondered how much longer she would have to raise her alone. Just when their life was supposed to be easy, it had taken a turn for the worse.

            Amanda and Lee had come clean about their marriage three months after they had done it secretly. Dotty had been upset. Doctor Smyth threatened to fire them, and then didn't. After the news sank in, everyone was happy about it. After another month, Lee moved into Amanda's house, his apartment no longer necessary.

            Lee was kidnapped by East German terrorists who had been operating a cell in West Germany. He'd been on his way home from a mission in the Soviet Union. Scarecrow wasn't the sole hostage; there had been others. Somehow, per the others' testimony, Lee had convinced the terrorists to let everyone go but him. That had been three months ago. 

            Amanda remembered how Billy had knocked on the door one morning, late enough that he knew he wouldn't wake her. He had told her that there had been American hostages taken. Amanda had shot a dozen questions at him: Who? Why? How do we get him home? She had railed at him a little; telling him it wasn't fair, and wanting to know what would she do without him?

            Two weeks later, all of the other hostages had been released. The story was that Lee offered himself in place of the others, told the terrorists to demand money for him. It had worked. He saved seven lives. They still had him, and wouldn't say why they kept him. They had initially demanded a ransom, but then withdrew the request. 

            Amanda knew they were torturing Lee. They sent a new picture every three weeks, so there had been four of them now. With the most recent picture came a new demand. The terrorists wanted nuclear secrets so they could build a bomb. No way would they be given that, Billy didn't even have to tell her.

            The pictures said a thousand words, truly. Lee looked terrible. He was gaunt, dirty, unshaven, and his eyes seemed to plead for death. She knew he must be freezing cold and starving to death on top of physical torture, and she missed him like Hell. 

            Amanda had gone into labor on the exact day her doctor predicted, and she'd thanked God that Dotty was there with her to help her. The labor was over sooner than expected, but Amanda wasn't too surprised since this was her third baby. It was good to see Dotty smiling at her granddaughter, her only one. No one had smiled much since Lee had been gone.

            Amanda had been on Billy's case from Day One about Lee's disappearance. In the way that only the top brass can, he put her off repeatedly by saying, "We're trying." Or, "We're working on it." She put in as much time as she could researching East German terrorist cells, but wasn't able to dig too far, and still she had to take care of her family. Dotty was there for the boys, but Amanda felt the need to be with them, too. They had after school activities and doctor's appointments to be driven to and picked up from. 

            She kept busy, trying to do it all. Lee needed her to rescue him so she tried to find him, using his Family. She tried to take care of her boys and her mother and all the errands involved in it. Keeping occupied wasn't hard, and she went full steam at it until her water broke in the early morning hours.

            Now, two months later, she still hadn't heard anything positive. She wanted to travel to Europe and find him herself, but she wasn't prepared to take her family with her, or leave her newborn daughter behind. She was determined not to give up.

            She thought of his perfect, loving eyes, his not-too-long, chestnut hair, his smile, especially the one where he showed his beautiful teeth. Next came her memory of his strong arms when he held her, hugged her, made love to her. She was reminded of his gentleness. Especially when he found out he was going to be a father. For a few days, he thought she couldn't do anything by herself. That or he just loved dressing her. She would have killed for that during the final month of pregnancy. As a new father, he had been putty in her hands, willing to do anything for her. Amanda couldn't lose that, she would do the same for him, and she'd prove it no matter how long it took.

            "No, I'm not giving up, Sweetheart. We've been alone for so long, but your Daddy will come and see you before you know it. It's hard, that he can't be here with us and I know he misses us terribly, but I'm going to get Billy to take action," Amanda promised her now sleeping baby. Though it was late at night, her determination was at full capacity. "We won't have to be on our own too much longer."

The End


End file.
